The Change

24 Jan 2010

Scrap and the orphan

I woke up early, too early this morning and couldn't get back to sleep.

This time of my life, this change that is happening is forcing new rhythms into my life and that's OK but it sometimes puts me out of sync with the rest of the house.

It is a gift, a chance to see life differently and follow new paths.

Menopause, it sounds dreary doesn't it.
It isn't a happy sounding word.
Mind you none of the official words used to describe anything to do with our monthly cycle are particularly enlivening.

School fair goodies

But 'The Change', 'The Change of Life', now that sounds exciting.

Do people still use that term?

I am sure that is how menopause was described when I was young, before it became a medical condition to be treated, ironed out flat, just another part of the life cycle to be hidden or commercialised in the sense of drug companies coming to our rescue.

The saying, attributed to Gandhi, 'Be the change you want to see in the world' has become the catch phrase of so many organisations and individuals hoping to inspire us to a better world.

Change is good, yes?
A chance to learn, to grow, to discover.

Change is an empowering word.

Change is never easy, sometimes we are dragged along kicking and screaming, sometimes bedraggled and bewildered, sometimes wide eyed and wondering.


Changes put our lives on a new footing, let us see opportunities that had been hidden, bring us to new places and new people, new understandings of others who have walked this path before.

This Change brings us closer to our mothers, brings us to a place were we can look back on the stages of our female lives and see how far we have come, lets us look at our daughters and appreciate how far they have to go.
It puts us firmly in our middle age, a time of wisdom, not the wisdom of old age yet but the wisdom of experience.
It gives us a glimpse of the journey ahead, not to frighten us by reinforcing our own mortality but to show us that we have so much more we can do.

The end of our bodies need to invest in a monthly preparation for new life gives us the chance to use that energy in a creative surge that is frighteningly magnificent but oh so wonderful.

So, 'Be the change you want to see in the world'

and you will find that

'If one advances confidently in the direction of one's dreams, and endeavours to live the life which one has imagined, one will meet with success unexpected in common hours.'
Henry David Thoreau

It really is true.


Just a note about comments, I have changed back to the normal blogger comment system, hope this helps anyone who has been having difficulties.

23 Responses to “The Change”

  1. Yes it works! As far as I'm concerned it has been a blessed relief. (But I do wake up awfully early too!)

  2. Lovely post Jenny. I've not reached that time in my life yet, but I like to think of it as the change too. Not better or worse just different...I hope.

    cheers Kate

  3. Hello Jenny,
    I like the last picture. Time for a nice cup of tea!

  4. I am a new follower to your blog and I wanted to say that I enjoyed your perspective on change. I am not ready for the physical change yet at this stage in my life but I am ready for a change in my life, trying to live more simply.

  5. Yes, I agree with above. Thanks for giving your perspective, it was so refreshing & positive. I hope to meet the Change with your enthusiasm & inspiration xo

  6. I am approaching this time of my life - I suppose maybe now would be finally the time to act mature. I love your perspective on it. I am not going to make a big issue of it, yes, it is uncomfortable at times. But compared to the upheaval in my life over the past few years this will just be a piece of cake (with chocolate frosting on it). It is a journey, bumpy in places but necessary in order to get to the destination.

  7. Other than developing an aversion to artificial heat, the change was a walk in the park for me. :)

  8. Dear Jenny,
    Yay, I can finally comment.
    Wishing you many blessings through this time in your life.
    Lovely post as always.
    I have the same sugar bowl as you!
    Take care & God bless

  9. Hi Melissa, the sugar bowl was my Gran's.

  10. Inspiring and encouraging words from the heart - This change is a new 'season' to embrace. I'll go on dreaming...
    Thank you so much Jenny.
    Sandie in Oz

  11. Hi Jenny, I am new to your blog, and am also a Jenny Wren well i was a long time ago. My mother still calls me that and i just turned 45!!!. I love your outlook, and yes it is the year for change in many ways. Thanks for sharing your insight.

  12. I am sitting here nodding as I read your post, having been awake for a couple of hours and the rest of the household still asleep.
    The change comes at a time in our lives when there are other big changes taking place, children leaving home, parents ageing, but it is all part of the natural cycle of our lives as it always has been.
    I like the Thoreau quote which I've not heard before.

  13. Perhaps a bit further down the line you might "change" your mind!
    I was determined to get through this phase of my life without medical help until...
    Hot flashes, aching joints, sleepless nights, brain fog, thinning hair, dry skin, vaginal atrophy (yes the sheer delights of the change cause this too)
    The sleepness nights had me wandering the house at 2 am just unable to sleep, the following days meant I didn't function well due to the lack of sleep. Sheer mind numbing tiredness meant I sought help - HRT saved me and my marriage. This wasn't a spur of the moment decision, I'm talking about several years of these symptoms until I could no longer function properly or think straight.
    I hope you're able to sail through without problems but please don't be afraid of seeking help if you need it. I now feel as I should, able to cope and get on with things. Good luck.

  14. Hi Joan, I am certainly not advocating not seeking help for any menopausal symptoms that are causing distress and there may come a time when I feel that I need some help. I do object to what seems to be the assumption that every woman will need pharmaceutical interventions. I guess I am talking more about the move into a new stage of my life rather than just the awkward/difficult transition phase of menopause.

  15. Hello - thanks for this easzier comment system - I really hope it works for you as well as for us.

    'The Change' will be very interesting for me, as my mother never properly went through it. It seems that it comes very late to women in our family, and my mother was ill with breast cancer and had chemotherapy, which just ended things for her anyway. Therefore, I have no model of how it might be for me, except that it may not be for a long while yet! Thanks very much for your thoughts, though.

  16. Hi dear Jen...I am facing many changes in my life at this point(NOT SO MUCH MENOPAUSE)but,more family related is very hard but,I am praying for wonderful results from all these changes...Change I realize can sometimes be a wonderful thing.....God is with me through them all and I will overcome....I pray your transition will be very peaceful and calm..... blessings to you and your dear family....

  17. jenny,

    this post was so intimately beautiful. thank you for sharing. i have just turned 30 ... in the "prime" of my life so they say ... just now looking forward to motherhood (hopefully!) within this decade ... you give me hope for the next twenty-plus years. i think you are wonderful. keep doing what you do and being who you are! and thanks for allowing me to comment, i had trouble before!

  18. A Lovely thoughtful post, punctuated with Gorgeous photographs.

    The change came early for me, and I am changed for the better I feel.

  19. Hi Jenny, I went through menopause many years ago and happily sailed through it. I agree medical intervention is inappropriate unless there is some distress.

    I have found this stage of my life to be profound and enriching. I hope the same happens for you.

  20. You have expressed your thoughts on this phase of a womans life so eloquently and with a gentle calmness and acceptance.
    I have been there done that, so to speak, many years ago, fortunately without the need for drugs but I know of many who have not been so fortunate.
    I wish you well on your journey through this, at times, somewhat challenging phase.

  21. Beautifully written. A perspective often lost in these modern times. Thank you again Jenny!
    Jenny in Kentucky


Thanks so much for taking the time to chat. I don't always have time to reply but I do read every message you leave.